Wednesday, 16 January 2008 – I am writing to give you an update on the condition of Lee Myers and to request prayer for him. Many of you know that Lee is a young man that is just amazing. He has been greatly used by the Lord in spreading the gospel and building up the body of Christ. God has used Lee’s simple faith in action to see many people receive physical healing, and Lee has been a catalyst in sparking passion for Jesus on his campus and several surrounding campuses. For the past year, Lee has been fighting cancer. Many of you joined us in praying for Lee in the summer last year when Lee’s left leg was amputated.

Here are the facts of Lee’s current condition. Just a short time after Lee’s leg was removed, the doctors found cancer in Lee’s abdominal wall. They did surgery in the fall to remove the cancer. Then, about a week before Christmas, Lee started experiencing discomfort from an excess build up of abdominal fluid and went to the doctors. Through the process of draining the fluid, Lee began experiencing a lot of pain and ended up in the emergency room. They did a scan at the hospital that would ultimately reveal that there were “multiple tumors” in Lee’s abdomen. The doctor’s analysis was that some of these tumors were growing pretty fast. Lee and his parents began meeting with doctors after the New Year to discuss treatment options. And that is how things were going until last week. After Lee had the fluid drained off again towards the beginning of last week, he was pretty sick from the pain. His parents took him to the hospital Friday, and he has been there since then.

That is an overview of what has been going on in Lee’s body, but that is not the whole story by far. Lee travelled with us to Kansas City in November for a leaders gathering. On the way home, we spent some time at a Wal-Mart waiting for a tire to be changed. Lee and his good friend Jeremiah ended creating an in store display by decorating a smiley face volleyball with sunglasses, a hat and various items from the sporting goods department. It was quite funny. The reason why I am telling you this is because when you open Lee’s phone, there is a picture of Lee and the volleyball man with the words, “but we press on”.

That is where we are now. Faced with a situation that does not look good to our eyes or sound good to our ears, we have an open invite “to press on.” Lee nailed it in a blog that he wrote a few weeks back. In Lee’s Blog, he wrote “…The tension is between pressing in and praying for stuff that’s not right in our lives to be corrected and pressing on into God and what He has for us regardless of what’s going on (pressing on vs. pressing in). They don’t really conflict with each other but it’s tough to do both at once… Never praying for the messed up stuff in your life to be made right isn’t what God wants, but if your life stops while you pray and wait on something to be fixed because you can’t go on until it is, you’ve just turned your problem into the biggest thing in life — it’s now even bigger than God and his grace to press on at all times. (That’s a bad thing)”

To be completely honest, my heart is broken when I see Lee suffering in pain. (I used to feel somewhat guilty about these types of feelings, because the whole lack of faith thing. Only it is not so much that my faith is lacking as much as it is that I see someone I love deeply, in a lot of pain. I stopped feeling guilty when I noticed that Jesus became vulnerable to our pain. He was called the man of sorrows. He even stopped to cry at Lazarus’s funeral, even though He was getting to turn it into a “welcome back” party.) But God is bigger than all of the brokenness that is going on in this situation right now. That really frees me to go after praying for my God to destroy the cancer that is trying to destroy my friend, even when my eyes don’t see the evidence that anything is changing.

The book of Habakkuk has come to mean so much to me over the last month. The book chronicles the burden of the prophet Habakkuk. I don’t claim to have a full understanding of all that is written in those three chapters, but I am encouraged by what I see. Habakkuk seems to be really honest with God about the hurt and frustration that he is living with. “How long do I have to cry out?” But it doesn’t seem to me that he is accusing God, or trying to make God do something. There is so much relevant good stuff in the book that I won’t get into, but I will add one more thing from the song that Habakkuk sings at the end. My paraphrase of the song goes something like this…

“Though I am standing in a middle of a garden, and there is no food…
Though I am hanging out in a barn, and there are no moos…
Though I am standing with the Healer in a hospital room…
Yet, I will rejoice in the LORD,
I will joy in the God of my salvation.
The LORD God is my strength;
He will make my feet like deer’s feet,
And He will make me walk on my high hills.”

I went to visit Lee today, and he was in a lot of pain. He really couldn’t talk much, so my friend John and I just sat there with him and tried to love him and pray the best we knew how. At the end of our time, after we were through praying, I told Lee that we were going to continue to stand with him and pray. That we were not ready to give up. That we would press on.

I know this email seems disjointed, but I am getting ready to ask you to join me in doing two things, and I want you to understand the heart that it comes from. I do not speak for Lee or his family or any of his other friends. I am writing you, simply as someone who loves Lee and believes God. For me, it comes down to these two thoughts.
1. God is good. I can trust Him. He is not waiting to heal Lee because we haven’t put the magic words in the right order. He is not looking for a formula or counting how many syllables of prayer have been uttered. He loves Lee more than I can imagine and He sent His Son to die for Lee’s sin and disease. It is not my job to make God heal Lee. I don’t have to scream louder or pray longer to pry healing from a stingy dad’s hands.
2. God has made us delegated authority on this earth. He has commissioned us to see the Kingdom come here like it is in heaven. I believe we are responsible to represent Jesus and the greatness of His kingdom to the world around us. Our target is to be with and like Jesus. He has given us His Spirit, so that we would do the same things that He did, and Jesus said that we would do even greater things. I am commissioned to model an impossible lifestyle that demonstrates the love and power of God on this planet.

It is not enough for me to think that “whatever happens is okay.” It’s not. When I see Lee in pain, I am not thinking that this is “okay”. Tolerating what Jesus didn’t tolerate is not acceptable. I believe as a delegated authority of heaven, I am to be faithful to exercise that authority. Again, to be honest, I know that there are times that I fall short in this area. Sometimes I obsess about the way things are now, versus the way they should be. I could allow that lack of expertise to paralyze me, but as our friend Banning says, “Let’s live what we know”.

So we trust God and know that He has to touch Lee, and at the same time, we step into the place of authority and exercise our faith by praying and asking God to come. We declare the truth of the Word of God over Lee. We tell the cancer to leave Lee’s body, that it is evicted by the authority of heaven.

So, I am asking all of you to join me and many others in praying for Lee. I am asking you, I am calling you to pray and intercede with passion and a renewed view of our Father. We are not looking for the prayer of “trust” that says ‘whatever’ is okay. We are looking and asking for people to pray for God’s kingdom to come and His will to be done on earth as it is in heaven. We are praying that the pain and disease that was purchased on the cross by the blood of the Lamb would be removed from Lee. We are praying for strength and hope to fill Lee and his family. That the shalom of God would be with them. We are also praying that the leg that the thief has stolen would be restored. (We really do want to see everything that Jesus paid for be redeemed.)

I am also asking you to trust our Father in an expectant way. Let us not allow the cancer that we are praying will be removed, to become bigger than our God. Never allow “trusting God” to mean embracing something that Jesus didn’t, but let us never allow ourselves to forget who He really is. He is Love.

I will finally close this update with a thought that has been with me for a week or two. It is the story of the friends who carried the cripple to see Jesus. They got to the house where Jesus was and it was so packed they couldn’t get in. So they got discouraged and turned around and went home… Sorry, I was reading out the wrong book. What they really did was they climbed up on the roof and tore it up. That’s right, they ripped off the roof, so they could get there friend to Jesus. When ‘plan A’ failed, they said to themselves, “This is not how we planned it,…but we press on.”

I know that Jesus is alive and well today, but I have to admit, there have been several times in the last year when I have said to myself, “Man, I wish I could just pick Lee up and take him to where Jesus is.” I feel like my heart is provoked or compelled like the friends in the Bible. They were moved to action by two things. The fact that their friend was crippled and the fact that Jesus could heal their friend.

My heart says: “Take Action, Lee is in pain and our God will save.” This may seem foolish to you, but I want to rip off a roof and get my friend to where Jesus is. I was feeling that maybe for the rest of this week, and especially this weekend, we could all set some time aside and bring our friend to Jesus. God told us to come boldly to Him in our time of trouble, and Lee is in trouble. Whether people gather and pray together at some central location, or do it in their own homes, I am asking for you to consider dedicating some focused time to pray and fast for Lee. Let’s take time to worship and adore the Lord, to give thanks and to intercede.

For those of you in Western PA/ Ohio, if you are interested in gathering here and praying together, let me know and we will find a place to meet. For those of you across the country and around the world for that matter, I ask you to consider joining together with a few believers and really praying for God’s Kingdom to be poured out in this situation.

Some of our friends have suggested praying around the clock over the weekend. If you would be interested taking an hour slot, let me know. I don’t really care when you pray, but I just ask that if it is in your heart to pray, that you do so.

If you know other people that would join us, please forward this to them or call them. If your church has a prayer list or prayer chain, I humbly request prayer for Lee.

If you feel like the Lord is speaking something to you or your group that you think we should pass on, please email us and we will forward it to other praying people.

Thank you for your time and endurance. Thank you for pressing on with us.

With an expectant and grateful heart,
Brad McKoy

PS – I know many of you may want to contact or visit Lee. Again, I am not speaking for Lee, but I know that he has not really been up for a lot of calls or company, but you can email him if you would like. If you don’t have his address, just email me and I will forward it to him. Thanks.

Well, I have been away for a bit. Kind of a “blogging fast” and lack of internet access all at once. The last few months have been very interesting and somewhat difficult. We are navigating our way through an awkward transition to a place that still seems distant and mysterious. But the journey has been fruitful, and my God has been faithful.

I believe that I will begin to post more frequently again, and in fact we are looking into launching a more user friendly version of this blog, servantheart’s website and our personal site. There are a few things that i would like to throw out to whoever is still there as I/we continue to chase after Jesus and what New Testament Community should be like.

First – Is there ever a time when we unplug from healthy relationships in the body, to just be with Jesus. I am not talking about personal encounters, but seasons. I am not asking this because I think I know the answer, but it something I want to explore.

Next – Generational Momentum. I have been studying a lot about inheritance, government, wineskins and moving forward in our race with Jesus. I will not try to get into this now, but I would like to explore with whoever is intersted.

And finally, a Question – Where is Antioch? This is an important question in my faith walk right now. I am connected with some amaizing people in the body of Christ. I feel like I have some godly elders in place, and that I have some fellow pilgrims that keep me accountable. My heart is searcing though, for a spiritual home for me and my family (both spiritual and physical) I feel like I tend to carry things in my heart, that would benefit from having an “Antioch” type of faith community, where what is in my heart could mature in the context of “a community growing within a community”. I feel like apostolic/ prophetic government, demands a place where people are fasting, ministering to the Lord through lives of worship, praying, imparting and sending people out. There are some of the markers of the “Paul and Barnabas Send Off” from this community. I am hungry for more revelation for what this looks like today, and in specifically for my life.

So… If you are up for some exploring and adventure, let’s go.

comm{ON}unity

An Introduction & An Invitation

by Brad McKoy – August 5th, 2007

I am writing this post with a sense of apprehension and excitement. I wonder if what is in my heart will resound with anyone else, but my what is in my heart is pounding louder than ever. The rhythm provides my spirit with music to run to. For a while now, I have had a hunger to pursue community. I am not talking about a geographical neighborhood, nor I am talking about a bunch of people who like each other or share a common interest. I am looking for what seems mysterious and simple all at the same time. I am talking about a series of relationships in which people are committed to each other as they pursue a shared purpose.

One of the mysteries intrinsic in this type of community is the exponential life and blessing that is poured out in these relationships. Right now, I am walking in relationship with some people that seem to be on the Verge of this type of life-giving relationships. It seems like there is an extra layer of life when we are together and tuned in to the heart of God and each other.

I spent time with some of these people on Friday. We were heading into Pittsburgh to pray at a few college campuses. (I am sure that more will be said about our campus adventures in the weeks to come.) We reached the campus of Duquesne University and the five of us set off to find a place to spend some time praying over the school. On the way, I noticed that there seemed to be a heaviness over the little group. It was not like people were in a bad mood or anything, there just seemed to be a bit of weariness. So we changed plans and ended up in one the schools cafeterias. What happened next was really amazing.

I just asked how everyone was doing and then we prayed for two of our friends. It is not like angels appeared with a magic pill that made everyone feel swell, but there was a drastic increase in “the life” that we were sharing. Faces lit up. Dreams were uncapped. People began to int erupt each other, but they did so because they were “online” and could complete the others thoughts. By the time we left the cafeteria to go get lunch (we had to go see our friends at “the FRANKTUARY”) we were laughing and contemplating how we could take some steps to see our shared dreams come into reality.

Real community turns the switch to the {ON} position. Dreams awake. Dreams that have not been heard of for eons. Conspiracy begins to spread from heart to heart, and the possibility that our secret kingdom dreams could possibly be fulfilled fills our hearts with hope. Imagination/ImagineNATION

This post will probably seem empty to most, but it is being written for the few who hear the same rhythmic song in their heart. It is written for those who are longing to be a part of something real and full. My heart is unsatisfied with the status quo, and I don’t want to be satisfied with anything less than all that God intends for us. So I am looking for some people who will join me in studying, praying and contending for greater levels of Christ centered, authentic community.

So here is the invitation. I would like to invite anyone who is interested in exploring the parameters of authentic, Christ-centered community to join me in an ongoing, online discussion. We can look at different aspects, questions, common obstacles and the like. What do you think. If you would like to be a part of this type of thing, let me know by emailing me at bradriane@gmail.com or by leaving a comment. I hope to gauge interest and start with the first discussion the week of August 19. That gives two weeks to identify those who are interested and to get some direction for questions and discussions. Please give your input. Thanks!

hello all… I am sorry that I have not uddated things in a while, things have been hectic and internet access has been scarce. Two quick things. One, the Call was sweet. They say somewhere arond 55,000 showed up for the day of fasting and prayer. It was amazing. So much more than a concert or festival, but truly a day of crying out for God to have mercy on us and send revival to America. I will try to write more later. Next… Monday I went with my dad to the doctor. They had told him that they thought he had thyroid cancer. Well good news. He does not. I don’t know if it was there and Jesus took it away, or if it was never there and the doctors were just wrong, but praise God no matter what.

A couple of weeks ago I entered a post called “Countdown to the Call”. In it I made some statements about how important this gather in Nashville on 7.7.07 is going to be. YEAH! TURN THE VOLUME UP ON THAT! Please check this thing out at the call’s web site or at fastandpray.com. I can tend to be dramatic at times, but I hate hype. Still, this may be the most important day/ season of a generation.

I really believe this could be a day of “biblical proportions”. I have been reading Psalm 50 this week. In verse 5 God says “gather all my saints to me who have made a covenant of sacrifice”. He is calling heaven and earth to recognize who he is and worship Him. God is jealous over His creation, and is longing for His people to really belong to Him.

God is ordering things right now. He is bringing up issues in my life and inviting me, pleading with me to deal with these issues. He wants us to walk away from other gods that we have given a place to, and enter into a monogamous marriage with Him. Twice the word “order is used at the end of Psalm 50. First, God says that He is going to set things in order, but in the last verse, He says that He will show “the salvation of God” to those who “order their conduct aright”.

This is not a time to “do what we feel”. Now is a time to recognize the truth of God and to respond to Him with a whole heart. Don’t think you’re e ready for that yet? Just move towards the Father’s Call as much as you can. Let His strength meet you and draw you further into His presence and purpose than you ever thought imaginable. Your destiny depends on it.

So, I don’t know what you are doing next weekend, but change your plans and go to Nashville. God is gathering a nation to Himself. I really believe that future generations will look back at this day as a watershed moment in history. Don’t sit on the sidelines. Be there. Be a history maker.

I am showing my friend Trudi how she can use a blog to direct traffic to her new on-line travel agency. It’s is a great way to get good deals on travel. Check it out at www.appleblossomtravel.com Keep her in mind if you are looking to book a cruise or resort get away.

Let me tell you that this has been a crazy week. I have not gotten a chance to post since returning from Tennessee last Wednesday night, but things are going full speed here in Western PA. I am a bit lonely without Adriane and Abigail, but it has been good to see family and friends.

So, let’s get straight to this “unflat earth” subject. Have you ever felt as though you were getting ready to fall off the face of the earth? I have. This morning was a pretty good example. I felt like things were starting to go out of control. I could almost picture my self holding onto a ledge. My hands felt tired, I just know I am going to lose my grip and plummet right into nothingness… But then I remembered that the whole flat earth concept turned out not to be the way it is. God thank you for making the planet round.

It is not my life is bad, there is just a lot going on. I would be less than genuine to pretend that it is all good, but I would be blind to surrender to the delusion that it is all bad. God is really good. He lights up my face. When I let myself enter into Him instead of hanging on to the stress, I find that He lavishes love and peace on me. Then He gives me insight and wisdom to know how to walk through whatever shadowy valley that I find myself in. That’s pretty sweet.

So I was reading the latest book by one of my favorite authors/ speakers last night. His name is Bill Johnson and he is a “Mac lover”, pastor of Bethel Church in Redding, Ca. and one of my “Myspace” friends. In the book “Strengthen Yourself in the Lord”, Bill brings up some really cool stuff from the life of King David. One is relevant to today’s post was how David reacted when his world was falling apart. You should read the story in I Samuel 30, but in the midst of a horrible day for David and his men, David found strength and encouragement in the Lord his God.

What do we do, when we feel like things getting ready to fall apart, when we feel like we are falling off the face of the earth? Do we give up? Do we give in? Do we look to find our strength someplace else. Sometimes we try to withdraw from the situation or hide. I believe that in many ways, the paths that we chose in the midst of our “worst days” is directly linked to how far we will get into our destinies. Bill added that it is not God’s responsibility to fulfill our potential.

I am not complaining when I say this, but I am walking through some adversity at this point in my life. One thing that Adriane and I pray for, is that we will walk through the difficult days with courage, integrity and with God. We have a lot of unanswered questions right now, but my heart is really filled with anticipation of what is about to happen. So don’t give up, don’t let go and remember, there really isn’t an edge to fall off of…

SHOUT MY FACE!

This will be quick. Today, actually in the early hours of the day, I registered for a Face Book and ShoutLife accounts. I did this mostly as an experiment to see the differences between MySpace, FaceBook and ShoutLife. I also am hoping to be able to use these “social networking tools” as a way to keep up with people during this “vagabond” season of our lives that has been made more awkward at the loss of my cell phone.

Anyways, my username for all of the above social networks is bradriane. (BrAD + ADriane = bradriane.) There is not much content up on any of my profiles yet, but I hope to add some stuff over the next week or two. Maybe I can sweet-talk my sister Heather, who is becoming a Face Book expert, to helping me out a bit. I also secretly hope to send my “SHOUT MY FACE” friends to my real blog.

I am feeling a bit frustrated at the moment. The kind of frustration that I used to feel in high school after getting a “C” on a paper that I realized I could have totally aced. Probably one of the highest levels of dissatisfaction in my life deals with a lack of discipline. I really want this to change. I want to work on “the paper” before the night before. Who knows, I might actually like applying my self.

“The paper” that I am currently frustrated about is entitled: “God, You ARE #1″. Now I really mean this when I say it, and I think that there are areas of my life that demonstrate His Lordship in my heart. But then there are those times when I fall so far short in really giving Him the best of me.

The main area of focus right now is my time. Lately, I have become more aware of the scrapiness of the time that is set aside for “just being with Him”. When something is pressing, I definitely call on Him, and there’s been a lot pressing lately, so it’s not like I haven’t been talking to Him… It’s just that I don’t want to give Him “scraps”

The famous study tool, “The Brad Knows It Best Greek Dictionary”, gives the following definition for scrap.

Scrap {n} something that nobody else wants or consumes – used in a sentance – When they cleaned off their plates, they gave the scraps to the dogs. The word “scrap” comes from the word that means to scrape – example - to scrape the bottom of the barrel.

I am completely making this up, but it sounds good. Right?

I don’t want to give God only what nobody else takes or consumes. I don’t want to give Him the cheap time slot or the insignificant part of my heart. I want to be diligent on this. He is not an assignment, He is my Father. He really is my Everything.

no more scraps…

This is the blurb that I wanted to get posted last night, but there was too much going on, so I am going to post-post this back to yesterdays date because when I want to look back on my Fathers day thoughts, I will most certainly forget to look at the day after Father’s Day. Make sense? Nuff said!

Now, Father’s Day has taken on a completely different feel for me over the past two years. Before, it was only a day for me to say “Happy Father’s Day” to my dad and other great dads across the world. Now I am numbered on this special day. It is a special honor, and this year my little girl really made me feel like a happy father… Last year she was less than two months old. It was cool to be a dad, but there wasn’t much interaction with my child. She just sat there and looked at me. As cool as all that was, this year I woke up to my little Abigail saying “Daddy”.

Pretty much made my day with that one word. But she didn’t stop there. She said “happy abby”. My hear melted as she hugged me and we danced across the bedroom floor. My wife just looked at us and smiled. Indeed Father’s day is getting better and better. I am only on year two of “father” status, but this special Sunday in June is fast becoming a favorite.

I am not trying to over spiritualize stuff, but I have had a thought that seems kind of important, so I will put it out there. We were created for a relationship with Father God that is real. People talk all the time about a “personal relationship” with God, but there is little interaction with Him that changes anything in life. How inferior. If my day was made by hearing my little one say “daddy” with a giggle in her voice, what is Father God feeling about how I am interacting with Him. Is He waiting to hear the words fall from my lips that will re-capture His heart?

I am not sure how everything works, because I know He’s God, never changing, all-powerful, all-knowing and all of that really important stuff. But I also know that as high and lifted up as He is, He has chosen to relate to us as a Father. Every sincere feeling of love or joy that I have ever received from Abigail’s love and attention to me, is a gift from the heart of heaven. Somehow, He is vulnerable to us and jealous of our time and attention. His affections are toward us. He desires me eyes to be turned toward Him, and I think that there are times that the timeless One waits to hear the words that will make the Father’s Day.